You can cure cancer, and they’ll still talk about your edges

What does messy black girl hair look like?? I’ll wait. The first thing you thought of was something ghastly, wasn’t it? And that fear rose up inside of you from the most embarrassing experience you’ve had with your hair, right?? This topic about Black women and our appearance is a rigmarole grueling rhetoric. I’m not sure if we’ve painted a clear picture when it comes to the nuances and defining the polarity between a messy hair look and wearing your bonnet for the day because you simply want to.

So, whether you’re in between blessings, had to endure the tragic appointment reschedule, or in between ideas how we decide to appear during our work or casual existence should be free from overt speculation and the endless discourse. Did I like to see my fellow sisters in bonnets in public? No. My friends knew never to do it in my presence because without saying it, that group of friends internalized the same sentiment. But where did my disdain come from?? My family. Then I started to truly dig into the core of my belief, asking where did that sentiment come from and so on.

 Simone Biles, the greatest athlete in the world is not wearing a middle part, pre plucked, 30-inch wig during competition to appease millions of Black Americans cheering for her to win another gold medal. She has to focus on more important things like scoring the highest points, not “oh my gosh my edges aren’t slicked down.

The insatiable desire to bring attention to the condition of another woman’s hair instead of her accomplishments, her talents, her brilliance is a thorny bird’s nest of discomfort and outdated rhetoric. The public ostracizing of Gabby Douglas in 2016 taught us many things but the question that lives rent free in my mind.

 What is messy black girl hair? Is it the hair after you came from inside to get a sip of water during the summertime? Or is it the four-week-old braids with over an inch of new growth? It is imperative to define what these stages look like to provide comfort in our public appearances in all spaces not just the holy grounds of the local beauty supply store.